Please just watch over him and protect him! He doesn’t deserve this! He shouldn’t feel this way and it kills be just sitting here watching him and not being able to do anything about it! I’ve never had to experience what he’s going through, so i know i’m not completely feeling what he’s feeling, but right now, i feel horrible and i can only imagine what he’s going through. I don’t know how to make things better for him, and that’s all i want! He shouldn’t have to go through this! Was it because you didn’t think he could handle it? Was it because you didn’t think he was ready? Cause tonight i saw a man who was ready to face any challenges that stood before him. I saw a man that was ready to sacrifice all his hopes and dreams for someone else! I saw a man who felt guilty and ashamed for something that he couldn’t fully control! HE DOESN’T DESERVE THIS!! Just please, watch over him, protect him, help him cope with this. Just help guide him, that’s all i ask! And please, help me, help him!
You opened wombs tonight, and as much as i appreciate you being there for me, i don’t know if i can do this anymore. You thought you were gonna push me away….well i think the tables just turned. You know my weakness and you know exactly what can break me, and i don’t like that. i hate being weak in front of people, so i do the only thing i know how….push you away. I’m sorry matt!
so you know, from the surprise visit, skyping every night, our ‘dates’ and opening up to each other, you know i’m not suppose to fall for you. I’m not suppose to like you! yeah, makes complete sense! NOT!!! IF YOU DON’T WANT ME TO FALL FOR YOU OR START LIKING YOU, STOP ALL OF THIS THEN!! Let’s just save ourselves!
I can’t join or get involved in anything i wanna do because of how bad i messed up that year. It’s pissing me off! But whatever, im taking it as a sign that’s this wasn’t meant to be.
whatever, on the brighter note, i got a 92 on my last test and talked to Matt and his parents via skype. His parents were drunk and they were trying to convince me they weren’t. I say they made my night a whole lot better!